Life is the art of drawing without an eraser ~ John W. Gardner

News & World

How Do I Teach My Children In The Future?

The recent “Soup Kitchens Ban” news spread like wildfire.

I am aware that there are a lot volunteers out there feeding the homeless, my colleague is one of them. When I heard “some” minister cleverly suggested to ban soup kitchens just because he thinks it’s not good for the city image, I was shock.

Our city image, not just tarnished by the homeless and beggars, but also by a bunch of people who do not know how to manage the city!

If stop feeding the homeless can really get rid of the homeless problem, I think we should stop paying salaries to the government servants and make them all volunteers to curb corruptions. Isn’t that the same theory?

Also, the homeless now at least get one proper meal (and it’s not a luxury 3-course meal) in a day, if no helps come their way in the future, who knows they may get desperate and start robbing or stealing just to get a meal to live on. The government is already not helping these people, and now they want to ban volunteers from lending a helping hand? Worse, punish the person who helps.

Andrew has always been a kind soul to people who need helps. He would always give a dollar or two to those who asked, but he doesn’t just give to anyone that comes. He’s very good in observing. We used to bump into a man with his wife in a restaurant asking for donation, Andrew has given him money a few times. One day I asked him, “the man is clearly capable of working, why do you still give him money?” “Did you see the wife? She doesn’t look mentally healthy, and you look at the man’s shirt and hands, the fingers and nails are all dirty and black, obviously he has a job, some hard labor maybe. I think he needs extra money for the wife’s medical expenses.” I was so touched and surprised that he could see so much that I didn’t. From that moment onwards, I’ve told myself to see beyond. I would also love to teach my children (not just my own, my friends’, my nephews and nieces, any child) to always be kind like Andrew but see beyond and know when to help.

If at all we were banned (and fined) from helping the needy, how on earth am I supposed to teach my children in the future?

NO! You can’t help them, you’ll get fined!

NO! You shouldn’t give them food or money, the police will fine you!

“But mom, the books and teachers told us we have to be kind and help those in need.”

What will the world become without empathy and kindness? Everyone will be so selfish.

I seriously don’t want my children to live in that kind of world.

I Need Hope

It’s beyond words…… I can’t believe that I’m reliving the pain and heartache…… For people that I don’t personally know.

In the past, I only felt a brief moment of sadness when I heard a plane crashed. This time, it is my country’s airline…… It is so close to home and heart. 239 lives…… I feel more than just pain……

We all went from hopeful, to now hopeless. That is the hardest part, to accept the fact that all hopes are gone now. Miracles will not happen.

For a stranger like me to feel so much, it must be overwhelming and so hard for the family members……

Anger will come…… It is part of the process of grieving…… Our government better be prepared to provide answers. People, will not take ambiguity and avoidance anymore.

If the debris confirmed to be of the MH370, I will feel angry too……

Why did it turn back? Why did it end up in the Indian Ocean? Why didn’t someone pick up anything on the radar? Why was the communication system deliberately turned off? Why would someone do such thing? Why didn’t the government tell us earlier? Why waited for so long?

I need to feel hopeful again.

What’s Next?

Majority of us wanted a change. A change in government, a change in direction, and a change in our life.

We made the history again. 80% of the eligible voters voted. First in history. Most of us did the best we could to exercise our rights. Every vote counts and we make sure our votes count.

I voted. I waited.

When I saw the results the next morning, I got restless.

Shocked, surprised, confused, sad, angry…… How could one be overwhelmed with all these feelings at the same time?

I was shocked to see that the results took a sudden turn when I slept.

I was surprised to see that the opposition won so many seats.

I was confused to see what was supposed to be right became wrong.

I was sad to see the racism from our leader.

I was angry that our leader clearly does not understand what his people want.

My heart ached, for the future of the country.

I know that you can’t change the course of a nation over one night. Rome wasn’t built in a day. However, the behavior of our leader makes me sick.

Why can’t he see?

It is never about our races.

It is never about our religions.

It is never about our beliefs.

It is always about, Malaysian.

Please, all we ever ask for is, lead us to the right path, bring us to a better place.

It is always, US. All of US.

Don’t try to divide us. We will never fall for such childish trick.

Don’t try to “color” us. We are “color blind”.

Don’t try to fool us. We are “color blind”, but not blind.

If you still want to remain in power, please be a leader!

Get rid of your muppets that aren’t contributing. They’re making you look like a fool.


Our Jalur Gemilang (Stripes of glory). Do you see the many colors that represent all of us??? We are ONE. We are MALAYSIAN.

Jalur Gemilang
Berkibar-kibar di hatiku
Jangan sekali sekala
Memijak impianku

Jalur Gemilang
Berkobar-kobar di hatiku
Jangan sedaya upaya
Memadam semangatku

Jalur Gemilang
Selalu di hatiku
Kita anak Malaysia
Kita bersatu padu

P.S.: I am not Chinese, I am MALAYSIAN. My dear PM, if my foreign friends can see me as a Malaysian, why can’t you?

I Am Malaysian

I am Malaysian
I can speak Chinese
Because my ancestors were Chinese
But, I am Malaysian

I am Malaysian
I call Malaysia home
Because it is where I was born
So, I am Malaysian

I am Malaysian
I choose to exercise my rights
Because I have to do what is right
Therefore, I fight as a Malaysian

I am Malaysian
I vote for a better future
Because I want a better future

A future where we are all Malaysians
A future where I do not have to fill in my “race”
A future where we stand united as one race
A future where I do not fear my government
A future where the government serves its people
A future where I can proudly tell the world that,
“I am Malaysian
I love my country
And I love my leader”

~ Ashley

P.S.: Right now, I am not entirely proud of being a Malaysian. I am not entirely happy to be a Malaysian. I love my country, and it saddens me so much to see a bunch of monkeys running this country to the ground. It has become worse in the past 10 years. I am not sure of what the future will bring, but I am all hopeful. I am not a supporter of the opposition, but I am a supporter of change. 56 years…… It is long enough. Chance should be given to others, just like when the Americans given Obama a chance. For better or worse, we will be the ones who make the history. The vote, is in our hands. Why are we so afraid of change? I have heard people saying, “no one is capable enough to rule this country”. My dear, we are not sure, we are not sure. Don’t judge too quickly. At least, a change is better than nothing. Change, is what we need now.


He gave his people hope, but many are now disappointed. At least, the people of USA held their heads high and said, “I made that change”. I wish I would be able to say that, on 5th May 2013.

It Isn’t The End, Not Yet

Almost everyone is discussing about the prophecy of 2012, that according to the Mayan calendar, the world is going to end on 21 December 2012.

With all due respect, I am always amazed by the Mayan culture, but I don’t think the world is going to end.

On the other hand, I do believe that something is going to happen.

It would not be the end of the world, but something, some changes are going to happen. I don’t know what it might be and how it is going to be like, I’m no rocket scientist.

Ironically, if nothing happens, the Mayan calendar and prophecy would be the biggest joke on earth, ever.

To me, the end of something is always a new beginning of something else. We human adapt to changes very quick. Come what may, I believe we will be able to get through it.

I am more concerned and worried about us human sabotaging and exploiting the mother earth. As I’ve always said, the end of the world, would be us human who bring it upon ourselves.

Before we go on and chanting “Mayan prophecy is coming true”, take a second and think – WE, are actually building our own end-of-the-world. That, is even scarier and more truth than the Mayan prophecy.

Perhaps, the Mayan was merely trying to tell us not to exploit our earth.

BERSIH For What?

I’ve been wanting to write about this yesterday. However, knowing myself, I know I shouldn’t put anything in writing when I am upset, disturbed, confused and feeling unwell.

If you have no idea or not sure what BERSIH is all about, it is time for you to understand it better. You don’t support something blindly without understanding the meaning behind it. You can read the full description of Bersih on Wikipedia:

The Coalition for Clean and Fair Elections (MalayGabungan Pilihanraya Bersih dan Adil) or Bersih (meaning clean in Malay) is a coalition of non-governmental organisations (NGOs) which seeks to reform the current electoral system in Malaysia to ensure free, clean and fair elections.

BERSIH 3.0, was not just about go there, show up then go home. It was about sending the message to everyone, that we want at least a fair election.

Why the clean and fair election, you asked.

The current ruling party has been governing the country for nearly 55 years, of course we can’t deny the good times and good things that the previous leaders had brought us. We are not some ungrateful people who do not appreciate what they have done for us. Indeed, as many others said, we have benefited from the existing government and system too. So, why suddenly do we want the change so much now?

Look at the recent years! A local artist, Auguste Kwan, wrote this on his Facebook:

50年前,大家說,馬來西亞真好,好過香港日本。 30年前,大家說,馬來西亞還不錯,比得上韓國台灣(不提香港和日本了)。 20年前,大家說,馬來西亞還可以,至少超越中國泰國(不能和台韓比了)。 10年前,大家說,馬來西亞再差,還不至於像越南印尼。 今日,越南印尼經濟成長率領先大馬,該醒一醒了。

Translated to:

50 years ago, everybody said, Malaysia is great, better than Hong Kong and Japan. 30 years ago, everybody said, Malaysia isn’t bad, comparing to Korea and Taiwan (didn’t mention about Hong Kong and Japan anymore). 20 years ago, everybody said, Malaysia is OK, at least better than China and Thailand (couldn’t even compare with Korea and Taiwan anymore). 10 years ago, everybody said, no matter how bad Malaysia is, still ahead of Vietnam and Indonesia. TODAY, economical growth in Vietnam and Indonesia is now ahead of Malaysia, it is time to wake up now.

We are a developing country, we have enjoyed the many good developments in the past 50 years. However, recently, things are starting to get very “dirty”. Even the election has become so dirty! The last time around, we didn’t even get to elect our own PM. That aside, there isn’t much developments and improvements for the past few years, except more and more controversies and dirty politics.

I am so frustrated with our public transportation after seeing other countries could do it so well. I am so frustrated with the price of the vehicles here after knowing other countries could buy our home brand cars at a lower price. I refuse to take public transport now because I am so pissed with it. Everyone is getting a car now, traffic jam is getting worse, all due to the lousy public transportation system. For the past few years, the price of everything is on the rise and yet our income remains stagnant. It is getting more and more difficult to even feed ourselves. The government gave us RM1000 more tax relieve, but they’re getting the same amount back from our daily lives. We are on a train backward, not forward. When we start calling for change, all the dirty tricks start rolling into play. Sigh……

With the internet is easily available now, thanks to the technology too, information is readily available to anyone who wants to know more. In the past, all we had was newspapers and local news on TV, the mainstream medias. Now, we have so many alternatives. We read, we be our own judge. No one can tell us who’s lying except our own selves. Whether we are right or wrong, no one can tell us anymore. I think, all of us are capable of judging what is right and good for ourselves. People are waking up……

Someone said by voting is not enough, we have to let the people around us aware of what is going on. I have tried, and I have failed too. There are still many among us who do not see what we see, who do not feel how we feel. Why? I do not know, I do not want to make any comment about them anymore, they get very defensive whenever I said they can’t SEE clearly. I respect their choices, after all, they are the ones who’s living their own choices. I can’t force them to see/do what I see/do. It’s all about free will.

Yesterday, this question suddenly rang in my head, what will happen if the ruling government falls? Chaos? Riots? Fights? 513 again? Andrew said, chaos maybe, but this will not be another 513 incident, as it will only involve the parties, not races. Chaos…… I hope after the chaos, if any, the good days will come.

Seriously and honestly, I love my country, I love Malaysia. I used to love my government too, but not anymore. I used to be contented with everything I was having or seeing, but not anymore. I used to be grateful of what the government did, but now I am only grateful that I live in a country with no natural disasters. I am no longer proud of my government. Why? I was brought up in a family believing the government has the best interest of people in its heart…… Since when I stopped believing it?! A country so beautiful without natural disasters, is being wasted.

It is a sad thing, to have to tell my friends and relatives, to go somewhere else where they can best use their talents and do not come back. It will be even worse, if I have to send my children to somewhere else and knowing that I can’t ask them to come back. Really, I am already feeling extremely sad whenever I think of that. One of the many reasons why I am not in a hurry to have a child, I know I can’t promise him/her a better future, YET.

After seeing so many photos and videos on Facebook and YouTube, I am feeling happy and sad, certain and confused at the same time.

Happy that it was indeed a peaceful rally, sad that there were minority who created chaos.

Happy that the authorities were less violent, sad that there were still some who showed the cruelty.

Certain that the change we want is realising soon, confused that if the opposition has some other agenda.

Certain that we made our stand very clear, confused that if the change would be good or bad.

If things turned out to be worse, there will be someone who would say “you have brought this upon yourselves”. How are we going to face and correct it then?

If things turned out to be better, will those who objected the change have a change of heart and mind?

The future is so uncertain. We can only hope for the best and do our best.

BERSIH for what, you asked me. BERSIH is our hope. Our hope for a better future for us and our children. Either they are going to blame us for not doing enough for them, or that we have done our best and made a mistake, or thank us.

It’s all your choice.

To those who went for the BERSIH 3.0 with good cause, my salute to you all.

Photo source from Curi-curi Wang Malaysia Facebook.

Fight For Survival

When it comes to survival, everyone will do their best to fight for it.

Malaysia is a beautiful country. We are blessed with incredible natural resources, great weather with the sun all year round and we do not have natural disasters like earthquakes and volcanoes (although we are very near to Indonesia).

I love my country. I called myself lucky to be born here where people of different races live peacefully despite the occasional racisms raised by the politicians. There are lots of delicious food here that you can’t get them anywhere else in the world. Being a Malaysian, it means that you are a food lover. I have yet to find a Malaysian who does not love our local cuisines.

Sad to say, our country which has been ruled by the ruling party for over 50 years, is heading no where.

The famous slogan of “Malaysia BOLEH”, meaning “Malaysia Can”, has become a sarcastic remarks towards all the problems here. You can’t find it anywhere else in the world, ONLY in Malaysia. Why? Because Malaysia BOLEH. My friend, Melissa wrote a very interesting post on various Malaysia BOLEH issues, “I Live in “Boleh” Land Ma“, is both amusing and sad. Those are cold hard facts.

The recent Lynas rare-earth refinery issue in Kuantan, is getting so heated that everyone is talking about the same thing. The ambiguity of the waste management is the key point here, but NO one seems to be able to clear the “air” and assure the people with facts. “Someone” just failed to understand what the people want is just as simple as “transparency”. The way “they” handled it, they think the people are all 3 year-old.

Our public transport system is such a pain. I used to be taking LRT (light railway transit) to work, but I hate it now. It is so poorly maintained that it often breaks down. It was so crowded during peak hours that at times I had to wait 20 minutes in order to get on the train. Now there is some longer coach/train, the crowd issue is sort of resolved but the maintenance is still pretty poor. Don’t get me started on the bus system/routes and the KTM (train).

Everything is on the rise, except our salaries. The inflation rate keeps on rising and we are struggling to make ends meet. If you’re earning RM5000 a month, with a RM1400 housing loan and a RM1000 car loan, you can’t consider yourself rich. Average, yes.

How do we survive in this country for so long? Well, we just, survive. The generations before us did not have the advantage of internet and technology, but we do now. People begin to see what’s behind the closed curtains and many don’t like it. They can’t fool us with foolish stories any more.

Are you doing your part as a registered voter? Seriously, in my opinion, those who do not vote, do not have the rights to complain. You are the one who gave up your rights as a voter, and you want someone to listen to you now?

For better or worse, change is needed.

Apple Will Never Be The Same

The world lost another great inventor and visionary, Steven Paul Jobs.

I am sure there is a lot of blog posts about the passing of Steve Jobs. I am not going to blog about his life as you can easily read it up in Wikipedia. Here, it is only how I feel about him and his Apple’s products that I owned or own or will own.

I have always felt amazed with Apple’s products. 12 years ago, when I saw an iMac, I thought the design was amazing and pretty, a breakthrough from all the common computers. However, I also thought that it was a luxury item to have, seeing that it cost so much more than a desktop of other brands. To own an iMac, has become my dream. Over the years, the iMac evolved, the desire of wanting it got stronger and stronger. I know I just gotta have it, someday, later. It is no longer a luxury item that I desire, it has become a need for better quality.

When I saw an iPod 10 years ago, I thought that was cool! The smallest MP3 player I’ve ever seen back then! Again, it was something that I could not afford. Even when I could at the later days, I no longer needed an MP3 Player. But it must have felt nice to have one.

There came the MacBook. OMG! A white laptop! WHITE! I was gasping when I saw the white MacBook. Again, the price was a big hinder and I stopped fantasizing of owning one. Then the MacBook Air!!! I started to salute Steve Jobs for his never-ending creativity and ideas.

The iPhone! It is pure God’s gift to human. A touch screen handphone, from Steve Jobs. When I touched it, I knew I was doomed. I knew I was going to have one or I’d never change my handphone. I was a proud and happy owner of an iPhone 3G, for 1 and a half years, until my carelessness do us part. The pain of losing it, still hit me every now and then, and I still miss it. I have a great Android phone now, but I still miss my iPhone. It’s weird, that when you have something greater and nicer but you still miss the old one.

If it isn’t because of the weight of the iPhone 4, I would have owned one too today. iPhone 4 is just too heavy to me and I do not feel the comfortability that I used to feel with iPhone 3G when I held it in my hand. I was no longer an iDevice user, for 6 months.

I was so tempted to get an iPad but I waited. When iPad 2 launched, on its very first day I went all the way to Klang to queue. With the iPad 2 in my hand, I felt a sense of relieve and ecstatic. Relieved as I am once again owning an iDevice, ecstatic because I was thrilled with the white iPad. Yes, call me silly, that’s how I felt to have an Apple.

Am I an Apple fan? Yes, I definitely am. Am I a Steve Jobs fan? Yes, no question about it. However, now that Steve Jobs is gone, I am not so sure if I would still be fascinated and excited with Apple’s new products. I stand firm on getting an iMac when I am able to in the future, but any new products from now on without Steve Jobs in the picture, I am not so sure. I believe the engineers and Tim Cook will do their best to continue Jobs’ legacy, but it is just NOT him anymore. Apple without Steve Jobs (although he stepped down from CEO quite some time ago, now he is gone forever), is different.

Steve Jobs is gone, and he took a part of the passion I have for Apple with him.

Farewell, Steve Jobs. May you rest in peace. We love(d) you, and thanks for all the wonderful things you’ve created. You will never be forgotten.

Photo courtesy of Apple

Can You Handle the Truth?

All the photos and videos published on the internet and Facebook, has shown me nothing but the brutal and ugly truth.

I’ve felt disappointment, sad, angry, shock, confused…… I have tried to justify the things that they have done to the unarmed civilians. I have told myself to look at things differently. I have also told myself things may not be as bad as it seemed.

When I saw this new video of truth, I couldn’t hold it anymore. I was weeping… in the office. I had my hand on my mouth, trying very hard not to make a sound. However, I just couldn’t hide what I felt anymore.

For the first time, I felt sad watching my fellow countrymen brutally treated by the law enforcer. Those people who are supposed to protect us civilians have become the street bullies.

For the first time, I cried, for the behavior of the police. My heart ached so much to see them acting in such gangster-ism.

I’m not sure if it was me being plain emotional…… Every time I read the news about the rally, I feel sad.

We only want a fair system, is that too much to ask for?

I don’t vote to change the leader, I don’t vote him out, I don’t ask for him to resign. I vote for a balance of voices in the room so that no one is dominating the rest. I vote so that he could see the big picture.

I vote for a change, a better tomorrow…… We just have to prepare ourselves for the worst. When the going gets tough, the tough gets going. So, be the tough ones.

If we can’t be the tough ones, no one can help us to fight our own battle.

May the truth and wise ones prevail.

The Yellow Wave

I didn’t expect it to be this “big” until few days before 9th of July. People were (and still are) constantly talking about it. When the  day came, it was all over the news and Facebook.

A day that I saw truly, 1Malaysia. Should “he” or should “he” not be proud of this?

I was following the updates on a news website, every now and then was shocked by the actions and photos. I was so shocked to read the police fired tear gas into a hospital! I was even more shocked to see police went all violent and kicking an unarmed man who didn’t do nothing but merely sat on the floor.

Some may argue, the police has warned the people and they still did not dispersed so they had to use force. But kicking people who weren’t doing anything? Firing tear gas into a hospital? Violently arresting the people? Being rude to the women? Well, perhaps you may want to argue again it IS the people who gave the police the reason to behave that way. What crime did they commit then?

A lot of us waiting to see some changes, yet we are not doing anything than complain, complain and complain. Some even told me that they refused to vote since there wasn’t any capable/right candidate that is fit to be a leader. Well, they forgot, it is our duty to vote, for a change. I am not seeking an extremely capable leader, no one is a perfect or the best leader in this world. Everyone has got their mind or way to rule the country, remember, one man’s food could be another man’s poison. What’s good for you may not be good for others. I only want a change. A change in how they do things and how they treat us “rakyat”.

It is sad and scary, to see how our mind got manipulated to the current state. We even think that everything against the current state is something we should avoid. So, we continue to let them rule the country and manipulate us further. When is this going to stop?

If they couldn’t hear our “voices”, we have to make ourselves heard by exercising our rights. Could the other party hear better? Perhaps. Could the change be worse? Maybe. Should we be afraid of the change? Yes, because no one can guarantee a better tomorrow but ourselves.

Do you know, sometimes, ANY change is better than no change, at all? Any change…… Better or worse. If it is better, be grateful. If it is worse, we just have to prepare ourselves and face it bravely.

Every life decision you make, there is always the risk. Do you take the risk, or just merely sit there and watch the sun goes down? I, do NOT want to be questioned, “where were you when the change happened?”, and all I could say is, “I just stood by and watch”. Better or worse, I want to be the one who makes it. At least, I know I have tried.

P.S.: There’s this lady, 50-60 years of age. She was in the rally. Where was I? Hiding in my cozy home fearing that I would get caught if I go out. If I couldn’t or wouldn’t even want to exercise my voting rights, I wouldn’t even be able to face myself!

Fin That Matters

I wouldn’t be the first one to blog about this. Just would like to bring the awareness to our society.

I too, have eaten shark fin soup, in many of the wedding banquets that I’ve attended. Sad to say, I had shark fin soup in my own wedding banquet too. Back then, I’ve tried to make my family understand that it is not a MUST to have shark fin soup in the dinner menu, there are so many other delicious soup that we could substitute it with. However, they were afraid relatives and friends would perceive us as petty and stingy for not having shark fin soup.

In some restaurants, they may use other fish fin, trying to cheat their customers. I took comfort in it, knowing that I wasn’t eating the real shark fin. Hence, I did not kill the shark indirectly. So, I could feel a little less guilty. That is so, so, so self-deceiving and self-comforting.

Saw some photos about a baby whale’s fins were being cut off and left alone to die a slow death near a beach. Some tourists saw it and knowing that there is no way it could survive, instead of letting it die slowly, they pushed the baby whale on to the shore so that it could die faster. They then called the local authority to report such incident.

That, got me start looking for shark finning documentary, and I found this amazing one. Sharkwater, filmed by the talented Rob Stewart.

You can watch the full movie here on YouTube.

The Chinese, may argue that it is their tradition to eat shark fin, just like it is the Japanese tradition to eat whale meat. So, it is like saying we are sacrificing our children’s rights to know about these wonderful creatures in order to keep our traditions alive.

It is a very controversial topic. Everyone has their point of view from the other side.

However, all I’m gonna say now is, I’ll stop eating shark fin soup. Sometimes people say, ignorance is a bliss. I guess there’s some truth in it. Because right after seeing all those documentary, I couldn’t bring myself to eat it anymore. Some may argue that chicken and cows that are killed to feed us human is cruel too. Yes, it is, but at least they’re killed quickly and not being left alone to die without their limbs. Go ahead and say that I’m a hypocrite, ’cause I do eat other meat too.

As The World Watches……

Japan fills every headlines recently. It is doing its very best to handle the crisis that it is facing now. It is not going to be easy, but the people of Japan have made it looks easy.

Melissa shared photos on with me yesterday. Tragic. Bandar Acheh was a tragedy, so is Japan, NOW. If you think you’ve seen it all, see and think again.

If you’re still pointing that little finger of yours at “karma”, please don’t forget you have 3 fingers pointing back at yourself. Name me a country who has done no harm to other innocent lives? Clear conscience? What about the foreigners who work and settle down in Japan?

Sad to say that, there are people who is idiot enough to say it is because Japan is over-developed. Trust me, if it wasn’t because of its so-called “over-developed”, the death toll would be so much higher and there wouldn’t be anything left in Tokyo.

The world is watching closely, how Japan is going to handle it, how the Japanese is responding to it…… The world sees discipline and kindness, that couldn’t exist anywhere else in the world during crisis.

My CEO is still in Japan. His wife and him were supposed to be in Tokyo last Friday evening. Half way through the Pacific Ocean, the flight diverted to Taipei because of the earthquake in Japan. He then managed to get into Narita, and then Tokyo. He said the aftershocks had never stopped for the first 2 days. When the nuke plant started exploding one by one, that got him a little worried. He’s been trying to get an earlier ticket home but couldn’t, all flights are full. He has to stay until Sunday. Sigh.

He wrote in his email to me, that everyone is going about their daily lives as usual, no sense of panic or anything. The news paints a different picture but things on the ground are still normal. I’m not sure if he’s trying to tell me that things are ok although the news said differently. I’m not sure. I just seriously and sincerely hope everything will be ok and he would come home safely. He is only my CEO, but the concern is deep and real. I can’t imagine how those who have families or friends back there in Japan will feel. Those are innocent lives……

A friend shared this blog on FB few days ago and those messages put me in tears. Heartwarming Japan Earthquake Twitter Stories.

I always get pushed at when boarding a bus, people bumped onto me and never bothered to say sorry, I got only cold stares and scoldings when I almost fell and bumped onto someone, people pressed the close button when they saw me running towards the elevator, people pushing each other just to get the best seat in the cinema, male colleagues did not offer help when they saw me carrying the heavy projector, young healthy guys fought with me for empty seats on the LRT, a man once pushed me away just for the extra little space in the crowded-hard-to-breathe LRT (and his girlfriend said nothing)…… I could go on and on and on…… (Do you know that in Japan, you actually get scolded by others if you do not give up your seat for someone who needed it more than you do?)

Most of us pray only for Japan to be ok, including myself. Now I am praying, for the world to learn a little bit more from Japan, and the world would then be such a peaceful and wonderful place to live in.

As we watch them, learn from them too.

*Photos courtesy of

Pray for Japan

The damage is bad, worse than anyone could have ever imagined. I saw people in Tokyo are still in discipline and order, never had I thought that it could be so bad until I saw the videos and photos of other areas yesterday. It is so, so, so bad. Death toll is hitting 10,000.

Some of the anti-Japan may not agree with me to pray for Japan, due to what they have done in the World War II. To me, those were the people who did it, not the innocent lives now. Some may even say that it is karma, and karma is happening now.

Praying, is the only thing that I can do. Pray for the innocent people in Japan. Pray that it wouldn’t get worse and pray that they have all the strength they need to go through this rough time. Also, pray that the tsunami ripples do no further harm. Praying, is all that we can do from the other side of the world.

This is not the time to be calculative. Can you yourself look everyone in the eye and say that you do none of them wrong? Would you admit that whatever mishap happens to you is karma of what you or your ancestors did in the past and you do not deserve help no? Who are we now to judge whether they deserve help? Are we in the position now to do justice?

To forgive doesn’t mean you have to forget. To forgive is to give yourself a chance to be free.

Pray, in the name of humanity. Pray for Japan.

AIDS Awareness & Women’s Day

Went to The Gardens Mall in Mid Valley city 2 weeks ago, with Wan Yi, Melissa and Nicole. Wan Yi was going back to Singapore and we wouldn’t be seeing her for some time, hence the small gathering to bid her short farewell, until we meet again.

After the lunch, we were surprised to see the AIDS Awareness campaign in The Gardens. All those photos with various local artists/celebrities holding up different messages about AIDS. What a nice campaign! It is all truly about educating the public. I wish they could do it in Suria KLCC and Pavilion KL too, where more youngsters and crowds are.

It was the International Women’s Day on 8th March, told Andrew I would like to celebrate MY day. No celebration on Valentine’s day and anniversary, ’cause we don’t celebrate love on one particular day, we celebrate love everyday. However, Women’s Day, how often do you celebrate yourselves as a woman? I bet not so often, or perhaps never. That is the day I want to celebrate for being a woman, no one appreciates myself better than I do. Don’t you agree? So being my husband, Andrew of course has to celebrate with me. Hahaha.

Went to The Gardens again, saw the AIDS campaign photos again, but this time on the other side of the mall. Wow, they’re different. I shall let the photos do the talking.





I think it was good education to the public, Andrew thinks otherwise after seeing all those public display of condoms. He was saying we shall educate people about sex, not like this, it seems that they’re encouraging people to have sex, sex and sex. LOL! Safe sex, my dear, safe sex. We can’t deny that we’re now living in a society where sex is so widely “advertised”, education on safe sex, STDs, AIDS, responsibilities and monogamy, is a must. We are having a lot of baby-dumping cases, averagely 1 baby-dumping case in 2 days! Guess what, 80,000 Malaysians are living with AIDS. We should really educate ourselves about AIDS and safe sex!

Ladies out there, love yourselves and your body. If you don’t even love or have respect for yourselves, who’s gonna love or respect you then? No condom, no play.

Guys out there, love and respect the ladies. If you can’t show your love and respect to the ladies, how do you expect them to love and respect you in return? Love her, and you shall have the respect.

Note: Photos taken using my Galaxy S, surprisingly good!

9/11 – 9 Years (via Fish Avenue)

9 years…… and the world is still grieving……

It’s been 8 years, since the world witnessed the WTC Twin Towers engulfed in smoke and fire and collapsed to Ground Zero. No one would or could ever forget that. Many innocent people and heroes died on that very day. We wept for the dead, and cursed the terrorists. The world has once again seen its darkest day. The fight against terrorism continues…… Will there ever be a day that the world is free of terrorism? [youtube= … Read More

via Fish Avenue

Remembering the Fallen

Today, 6th August 2010, marks 65th year after the world’s worst atomic bomb (Little Boy) dropped in Hiroshima.

There is one question remains extremely controversial and no one would or could ever provide a good answer. Was the atomic bombing justified? If we remember the Nanking Massacre, we would think that the Hiroshima bombing was the right thing to do to end it all.

How about the invasions of Japan? Was it justified too? The killings and torments of the innocent…… Ask any survivor of the WWII and they would tell you a bloody experience which they would prefer not to recall. My father was only 1 year-old and I wonder how my grandparents survived. Too bad they are no longer here to tell me.

“They” never apologise officially for what they did. “They” even denied it. Why? Why would “someone” commit an act (where the public knows it all) which they later deny of ever committing it? The guilt? The fear? The pride?

War is cruel. It is never good. No matter how hard you try to justify a war, it will never be justified. Killing innocents to revenge the innocents? Murdering your people to revenge my people? You bomb me, I bomb you? You started it and now it’s my payback time? When is it going to end? Some said the one with great power could end it all and win it all. No. No one wins in a warfare. No one…… Everyone is a loser. The fallen ones would always remain the fallen ones, no matter how much blood they had in their hands.

For the millions of lives lost in the cruelty of the war, innocent or guilty, may their souls rest in peace.

No more war, please. World peace.

Nanjing Massacre Memorial. Photo courtesy of Wikipedia.

The cloud of fire and ashes after the Hiroshima atomic bomb dropped. Photo courtersy of Wikipedia.

In Loving Memory

You never said goodbye.
Someone tell me why.
Did you have to go?
And leave my world so cold.

Is he really gone?
To the fans, he is never gone. His voice is still surrounding us everyday if we let it.
To his family, they may have felt his absence more than anyone else in the world.

It’s been a year, without realising it. It feels like it is only yesterday.

I couldn’t help but got teary this morning when I heard his voice coming through the radio. (Shh…… Andrew didn’t know, he would have laughed at my silliness if he knew. He is pretty skeptical about people tearing for an idol that they have not met or touched. :) ) I wonder if it was me who get almost emotional at everything recently, or it was the song that made me teary. But I know that I do miss him and feel sad for what he had to go through. All he wanted was to relive the childhood that he had never had the chance to live. The circumstances just did not allow him the luxury to do that. Was he guilty? It no longer matters anymore. He is now free from it all.

His faces are all over the TV channels again. How could one believe that he is gone when basically he still lives in our memory and our life? You can’t deny the impact that he had made and in fact, he is still making an impact on our life.

Try listening to “You Are Not Alone”, and tell me that you are not moved by it and tell me you do not miss him. It is a very emotional song. Soak yourself in it and you’ll understand why.

It is one year anniversary of Michael Jackson’s death. Whether you love or hate him, he remains the King of Pop, that no one could ever replace.

Photo courtesy of Wikipedia.

When it is no longer safe to learn

Photo courtesy of TheStar Online.

Close to the end of April 2010, a piece of news shocked the whole nation. Almost everyone was wondering how could a girl possibly have been raped repeatedly in the school.

School, which is supposed to be the safest place, for us to learn.

School, is supposed to be a place filled with laughters.

School, is a place that fosters love, not fear.

The school has now become a ground that provides nothing but threats and troubles, not just to the students but to the surrounding community and residents. Even the teachers and parents are helpless and live in fear too. How could one learn and gain knowledge in such environment?

It is a shame that it happens here in our country. What a shame for the supposedly-studying-and-innocent students to go astray and got themselves involved in gangster-ism. Worst, to become a rapist at such a young age. Their future, is torn apart by their own hands the moment they committed such crime. The victims, may have to undergo all sorts of therapies and treatments to be able to face the world again.

The only question in my head is, why has it always had to come this far for us to realise something is awfully wrong? There has got to be some signs or indications before it has come to this stage. Things must have been going on for some time for it to go all sour. Well…… Now isn’t the time to find fault or put the blame on someone or something. This, gives us the opportunity to re-look into our disciplinary system in schools. For the parents, it is time to really take note of your children’s behavior in the school and also their whereabouts after school.

For all the related news:

School of Terror

School Gangs Make It Hell for All

The Powerless Teachers

The Public Can’t Take It No More

Legalise the Illegal

Last week, 7th Of May 2010, Government May Legalise Sports Betting, was in the local newspaper and people is talking about it ever since.

If you have not already know, sports betting or gaming or the so-called bookies activities are illegal in Malaysia. I still remember when I was small, mom brought me to a salon for haircut and I heard someone came running into the salon shouting “mata coming” (‘mata’ as in police in local dialect). It was only later I heard mom said that there was an underground bookie operating in that salon. Even right up to this day, the police is constantly raiding bookies for illegal sports betting.

After so many years, the government is now considering to legalise it. What a dramatic move. There are a lot of reasons behind. Perhaps the government could make some revenue out of it. Maybe by legalising it, the government will be able to lessen the illegal bookie activities and thus giving the government more control. Also, the risk of bookies run away with the money would be lower then.

However, from the people point of view, I, see it as encouraging the people to gamble. No doubt, perhaps we can then curb the problem of illegal bookies running away with the money, and it helps to stabilise the betting system. But by legalising it, they are indirectly sending the wrong message that “everyone can bet freely” (of course there will be some age limit I believe).

Why is the prostitution not legalised then? Perhaps by legalising it we can curb the problems of underground/underage prostitution, and government could then have a better control over it. Something to think about.

Do you agree to legalise the sports betting?


The Day The Earth Falls

Or I shall say, the day the human race falls…… Soon?

Looking at the rate of occurrence of natural disasters lately, do they worry you? First, Haiti. Then Chile, Mexico, China…… And today, Western Australia. It is only middle of April in year 2010.

Something is going on inside our Mother Earth. No one has come forth to tell the world what is happening, not even the scientists. But one thing I do know, that the earth is very sick now. We can only blame ourselves for not taking the responsibilities to take good care of our only HOME.

Sigh…… What’s the point to rant here seeing that it’s not going to make any difference. For sitting here, typing on the keyboard that is plugged in to the computer, which consumes energy that is drawn from the earth, and emitting heat that adds to the global warming… I too, am doing damage to the earth.

People, it is time we do our part to revert the situation, before it is all too late.

Have you watched HOME? A documentary by Yann Arthus-Bertrand. Please spare some time to watch it. It is only 1 and a half hours long. You will then realize how selfish and ignorant we have been.

Click here to watch it on YouTube. HomeProject doesn’t allow embedding.

Another Fallen Star

Stephen Gately, most of us would have known him by the name “Stephen from Boyzone”, or “that cute guy from Boyzone”, or at a later stage “that cute gay from Boyzone”.

Boyzone is one of my favorite boy bands since school. My younger sister and I actually like Stephen more than Ronan Keating who seems to be the most popular in the group. We noticed that Stephen was the only one that would always look straight into the camera whenever it came to his face. When he sang, the song was written all over his face, he never failed to express. When he went solo, it was then everybody realised he got a beautiful voice too.

It’s just so sad that we’ve lost another great talented artist. He was only 33, at the top of his career. So sad…… A heart wrenching tragedy indeed.

Perhaps it’s not the end. It’s a New Beginning for him.

Goodbye Stephen. You will be missed, forever.

Earthquake. Tremors.

30th September 2009. 6.17 P.M. Cloudy. 14th floor, Megan Avenue II, Jalan Yap Kwan Seng.

I had a date with my BFF, Phoebe. She was still on the bus express on her way back to KL city. She told me she would probably arrive around 6.3opm and by the time she gets to KLCC, it would be 7pm. I decided to wait in the office and leave by 6.30pm.

I was on MSN with Wan Yi, Nicole and Melissa, happily talking about our trip to Taipei next year. Out of nowhere, I felt dizzy and my chair was swaying left and right. Gosh, I had the dizziness just few hours ago, did it decide to make a come back now with much violence? I even saw the blinds curtain in the empty room opposite me swaying a little. Me hallucinating? Was I really that sick?

Within that 2 seconds, I knew something was wrong. It was more than my dizziness. I  typed something in MSN, something about “it’s shaking”. I couldn’t remember. I stopped everything immediately. Hands on my desk, sitting, wanted to make sure. A second later, I felt it again. It was more this time. With my two feet on the ground, both hands on the desk and butt in my chair, I was swaying left and right. I felt it. It was more violent. The blinds opposite me was swaying, the walls beside my MD’s room was creaking!

I called out my colleague’s name who was in another room. He didn’t hear me. I opened my drawer immediately, grabbed my handbag and my handphone, wanted to make a run. When I stood up, I could feel it again. Gosh! I called out to my colleague a few more times, louder. He came out of his room and asked me what happened. Geez, he didn’t feel it! He was just in the room opposite me beside the empty room and he couldn’t feel it. When he came out, the shaking was gone. I told him to look at the curtain! The curtain was still swaying but it was settling down.

I typed to my friends on MSN “I felt the shaking… it is shaking… earthquake… I’m leaving… I’m going…” Packed my things, off my computer, I went to the other side of the office. 4 other colleagues were there, but only 2 of them felt it. They quickly packed and I waited for them to leave together. I couldn’t believe we took the lift down and not the stairs. It was later only I realised how dangerous it is if the tremors would have to happen again and serious enough to cause anything to collapse.

I was scared of course. In fact this wasn’t the first time I experienced earthquake tremors. First time was few years ago when I was on my bed about to sleep, second time was 2 years ago when I lunched with my colleagues in AMBank beside our office. Every time I experienced it, the first thing that came to my mind was I wasn’t feeling well. When I know it was the tremors afterwards, it was then only I got scared.

But this time, it was more. I got so scared. Was it lucky or bad that I didn’t run down in the first place? I should have done that, right? I almost did that, I grabbed my handbag and wanted to. But my colleagues were there. They didn’t act quick enough, I couldn’t just run without them, could I? Ironically, after came out from my office, I walked to KLCC, another high rise building. LOL! Surprisingly, I didn’t see any evacuation or people gathering beneath the KLCC towers. They didn’t feel it?

I checked the news on my phone, it was the earthquake measuring 7.9 on the Richter scale, in Sumatra. The tremors I experienced yesterday, twice, 5 to 6 seconds? Or longer? I do not know. It seemed short but it definitely felt long. Well, trust me, it was like forever when it happened. At that point of time, I was praying inside my heart for the people in where the earthquake happened. If I could feel such a strong tremors, the earthquake must have been a bad one.

Not everyone in every building felt the tremors. Andrew was at work, 7th floor, at Jalan Tun Razak, all of his colleagues and him didn’t feel anything at all. He later told me and joked, “well, that is one of the advantages working in a call centre, whatever happens, our building is the safest, and we will remain there to answer/solve your problems.” LOL!!!

Some people commented that they’ve missed the tremors and to feel the tremors is some hard-to-get experience. Why in the world would people want to feel how disaster is like? I do not understand. To them, it was probably something new and fun. To me, it wasn’t fun at all. The fear, the panic, the do-not-know-what-to-do feelings, I do not want to experience that at all. They said Malaysia is a country free of massive natural disasters. 2004, we had the Tsunami. Every now and then we experience tremors. Are we now still free from all those disasters? Would we have earthquake too sooner or later seeing the tremors going stronger and stronger each time?

To think back now, of what happened yesterday, there’s one little details I laughed when I told Andrew (he was the first person I SMSed when I came out from the building) the whole situation last night. The second time I felt the tremors in office, I opened my drawer to take my handbag and grabbed my iPhone from my desk! Hahaha. I didn’t know what made me did that. The panic attacked? People would just run without thinking. But my first instinct was “grab the bag and handphone and run”. LOL!!! Andrew said from that, we could see that I am a person who hold dear to my important belongings. Hahahaha……

P.S.: How fragile and vulnerable life is. We should really cherish every minute we live today. What will happen the next minute, we do not know. Like yesterday, I was so happy at that very minute and if something tragic happened, if the building doesn’t hold, I would not be sitting here sharing the experiences. Leave no regrets, and live with no regrets. Friends, I do love you all.


今早,又看到了一则让人心碎的消息。帕特里克斯威兹(Patrick Swayze) 敌不过病魔的纠缠,撒手人寰了。享年57岁。


对他的了解并不多,但是“人鬼情未了” (Ghost)我倒看了几次。虽然是旧戏,却非常的浪漫,没有一次是不流泪的。我已忘了第一次看的时候是何时了。我只知道大姐就因为看了那部戏,所以好喜欢Patrick。




Him, Again.

I think this is my 5th post about Michael Jackson. I know I never blogged about him while he was alive, and to blog about him now may only make me looking as if following the trend and news. Well, he IS now everywhere, on the TV, internet, news, music store, bookstore…… How can one-self not think of him when practically we are surrounded by him? Before this, when he was alive, the world had never been surrounded by this much of Michael Jackson. Don’t you agree? Not even when he was involved in all the accusations and having his concerts.

MJ’s most anticipated “This Is It” video, is coming soon. It’s a video all about his rehearsals on his never-get-to-do-it concert. Finally, we will get to see Michael Jackson performing on the stage for one last time.

Since he was an idol, I’ve never met him and I would never meet him now, he has always been in my heart and mind, he will always stay in my heart. In fact, him being dead doesn’t really change anything, except that no more “new” news and songs from him in the future. No more live performances. Oh yes, how could I forget! His great contributions to the children and the world. With his death, no one could or would continue what he was doing. That would change a lot of things. How sad. Guess most of the parents now would be begging for MJ to be alive instead of cursing him and calling him names that he had never deserved.

Enough of Michael. Now I am waiting impatiently for his video. Saw the trailer of it, awesome! His dance moves are unbeatable! You rock the world, Michael!

P.S: “Man In The Mirror” just can’t stop playing in my head! Weird……


Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 127 other followers