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I Need Hope

It’s beyond words…… I can’t believe that I’m reliving the pain and heartache…… For people that I don’t personally know.

In the past, I only felt a brief moment of sadness when I heard a plane crashed. This time, it is my country’s airline…… It is so close to home and heart. 239 lives…… I feel more than just pain……

We all went from hopeful, to now hopeless. That is the hardest part, to accept the fact that all hopes are gone now. Miracles will not happen.

For a stranger like me to feel so much, it must be overwhelming and so hard for the family members……

Anger will come…… It is part of the process of grieving…… Our government better be prepared to provide answers. People, will not take ambiguity and avoidance anymore.

If the debris confirmed to be of the MH370, I will feel angry too……

Why did it turn back? Why did it end up in the Indian Ocean? Why didn’t someone pick up anything on the radar? Why was the communication system deliberately turned off? Why would someone do such thing? Why didn’t the government tell us earlier? Why waited for so long?

I need to feel hopeful again.

Writing Ain’t Easy, But It’s Fun

Generally, I love to write. Most of the times, I express myself better in writing.

Recently I just have this crazy desire to write story…… Or I should say I have always been wanting to try writing a story. I’ve been writing about myself and what is happening in my life. I have not really tried writing a fictional story.

I’m a person who likes to dream. I’m not talking about those goals that I would like to achieve. I’m talking about daydreaming, imagining and let the thoughts wander…… Of course I don’t daydream when I work lah. I don’t daydream as much as I did when I was much younger. The window of time for me to be idle and let the thoughts wander is getting smaller and smaller. However, when I get that chance, I’ll just let my mind run free and imagine all things that I would love to imagine. I’ve never put those thoughts and imaginations to words. Now, I think it’s time for me to do that.

My vocabulary is at its worst lately. Many a times I couldn’t find the right word to express what I want to express. I have no one to blame but myself, for not reading at all for the past one year. Only did some reading on the internet. ARGH! Pick up a book and read, Ashley! Stop procrastinating! @__@

You’ll be seeing “short story” posts in the future. Of course, don’t expect incredibly fantastic stories from me. I’m not Patricia Cornwell or Dan Brown. :P

 

Short Story #1 – Mistake

The noise. The crowds. The lights. The faces. Everything seemed to be overwhelming tonight.

She gently swept her hair to the side.

She bit her lower lip, where he used to kiss.

The mere thought of it made her blushed.

Sitting in the restaurant, alone, waiting for him to show.

“He’s not going to come……” She thought.

“I love you, my dear.” He whispered in her ear two days ago. She was silly enough to believe that it was true.

She asked for the bill, and left the restaurant that they used to share dinner together.

He saw her leaving the restaurant. The look on her face made him wanted to run to her and hold her tight.

He knows he couldn’t. It was a mistake to tell her that he loved her. He had to right the wrong and let go.

“Let go…… You don’t belong to me, my love.” He whispered to himself.

Is Dress Code Necessary In An Organisation?

If you’ve been following me on my blog, or read enough, you’d know by now what my profession is. On and off I have to crack my head and squeeze out some extra brain juice for the company policies.

Sometimes I wonder, we are all adults, we should be able to know what is right, what we should do and what we should not do, why do we still need so many rules and policies to discipline us? On the other hand, I know there are people who will try very hard to find the loopholes and push the limits just so that they benefit more from the restricted situation. Sigh…… Trust me, we human are very creative when it comes to rule-breaking.

I’m not talking about a dress code that you have to follow strictly on what to wear. It’s more of a guideline on what is considered inappropriate in the office environment. Without a clear guidelines, people tend to test the limits. For example, when you say “appropriate length”, everyone has their own interpretation of appropriate length. What I deem short, the other person may not think so. Some think that as long as it’s slightly longer than a mini skirt, it’s fine. Some think that as long as it looks smart and neat then it’s fine to be short. I have even seen some fashion boutiques labelling some mini dresses as “work wear”.

I have people telling me that, “my butt is big, so the skirt looks shorter on me…… I am taller, that’s why it’s short.” How does that justify you wearing short? When you go to buy your clothes, don’t you try them on? If it appears to be short, do you still insist on buying? No harm to dress pretty for work, but pretty doesn’t mean you can’t look professional. I am tall too (5’7″), but I don’t use that as an excuse to wear something short.

I don’t deny that I did wear something short, but when someone told me it is short, I took note and I don’t wear it to work again. There were also times that I myself felt that it’s short when I was in the office and I don’t wear it again. When I buy clothes, I take extra note on the length of skirt and pants. It really makes me wonder, why can’t others do the same?

I really don’t wish the company to impose such strict rules on what we wear. We are all adults, we should know better how to discipline ourselves better. We are not children that need to be told what is right or wrong. Be a grown up, dress according to your profession and age.

I’m not some old lady who doesn’t have a fashion sense, and I’m not jealous of people wearing short skirts but I don’t. I do wear short skirts and mini dresses, not to work though. I just think you are portraying the company’s image through your actions, that includes what you wear.

Elegant-Contrast-Mini-Dress

This is a pretty dress, but is it appropriate for work?

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Yes, I’ve seen people wearing this short to work.

FFDress2

I would love to wear these dresses, but not to work definitely.

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Again, it runs a little too short for office wear.

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Does pairing a mini dress with tights/stockings make a mini dress looks professional?

meem-fit--flare-dress-in-summer-navy_1009687

Now, I can totally see myself wearing these to work.

skirt-fashion-6

Yes, I’ve seen people wore this to work too. On a smart casual dress down day though.

short-skirt-job-interview

And yes, I’ve seen people wearing this too and they think it looks “professional” just because they wore a working shirt.

Black-short-skirt

Please tell me I’m not being too strict or conservative.

8F7BA3EC

My skirts are mostly this length.

P.S.: I find Corporette has the coolest advice on female office wear.

我变了吗?

有人说
我变了
我说
是吗

卸下面具
做回自己

是快乐
是解放
是自我
也是自私
更是自在

没有了虚伪
没有了假装

不阿谀奉承,错吗?
不随波逐流,坏吗?

有人爱
有人恨
有人骂
有人疼

领悟了

自己快乐
才能带给别人快乐

回头看看
那副被卸下的面具


真的
变了吗?

~ Ashley

IMG_7339

戴着面具,就像隔着一层玻璃。有时,也只是为了保护自己。

Say It, Before It’s Too Late

Have you told your loved ones lately that you love them?

Friends, family, partner, co-workers, pets……

About a month ago, one of my long-time internet chat friends, lost her battle to dengue fever. When another mutual chat friend told me the news, I didn’t want to believe it. It was early in the morning and I was on my way to work. I thought he was joking and it wasn’t funny. “Check her Facebook, Ashley”, he said. I checked her Facebook, I was shocked to see people leaving messages telling her how much they miss her and all the rest in peace messages. I felt surreal. How could she be dead? It’s gotta be a mistake…… I did not want to believe that she’s gone. It was when I reached the office that the reality started to set in. Then the first thing that came to my mind was, I did not tell her that I love her and she’s always been a great friend. Now, I don’t have the chance to tell her that anymore.

That day onwards, I’ve been telling people around me that I love them. If something happens to me, at least they know that I love them.

My heart aches so much for the missing MH370. It hits so close to heart that I’ve been secretly swallowing my tears whenever I think of it. I can only imagine how hard it is for the family members.

Have you told your loved ones lately that you love them?

Living For Pain

It is strange
How you feel about me
How I feel about you

It should not be

It is odd
The way you look at me
The way I look to you

It must not be

It is bizarre
How time has worked for you
How time has worked on me

It can not be

It is not real
This is not real

To not feel the pain
To not see the pain
To not live the pain

It is painful to be awake
It is staying awake that can save me

Save me
Will you?

Save me.

~ Ashley

P.S.: How many of us can really pull ourselves back together after a tragedy? How many of us can really let go and live with the pain? They said, time is the best healer. But they forgot, there is some pain, even the best healer in the world cannot heal. The movie Snowpiercer inspired me to write this. Chris Evans’ character was living with a pain that he cannot let go. We can only try to forget, but we never really forget. We can only pray for the strength to overcome the pain, and live on.

snowpiercer

Worth watching, if you can ignore some of the non-logical parts. A pretty inspiring story. Don’t be surprised when you see the Korean language in the trailer. It is a Korean movie, by a Korean director. But the movie is in English, don’t worry. :P

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